Feeling Overwhelmed in Social Settings: How to Deal with Anxiety and Stress

I can openly admit that I am the most tense, awkward, and quiet person when it comes to large social situations. It’s something I try to work on, however it truly haunts the introvert inside of me when I look back at how horribly I handled the situations. Whether its meeting new people, or having small talks in a casual social scene, I tend to close up and become easily anxious and overwhelmed. Like I said, I am slowly working on it! Here are some tips I’ve put together that keep me sane.


1. IT’S NOT A BIG DEAL.

For some odd reason, when I meet friends of friends, the anxiety builds up inside me and I want to make a good impression so badly that it freaks me out! No one is going assume you’re nervous or anxious to begin with! Enter with a positive outlook and set it off on a good note. Sometimes we expand things so large in our minds that it becomes this huge cloud that consumes your true intentions and emotions. Don’t go into it thinking it’s a chance to make an impression, view it as a possibility to meet new faces and learn from them. Relax, take a deep breath, and stop overthinking.

2. I REPEAT, STOP OVERTHINKING.  

This one is killer! I am the crazy of crazies. I overthink to the point where it stops me from doing things. I overthink to the point where I completely close up and become a mute. Sucks, I know! Haha. If you are just as nervous in social situations, you have to take the chance and be completely open to listening to others and vibing out. Stop worrying about what others might think or say about you, stop caring if your nervous habits are weird or noticeable. Instead, focus on the people you are with, be attentive and listen to what they have to say. Ask questions, be interested. Even if you’re not! Make this your goal, instead of worrying so heavily on what others are going to think about you.

3. FACE YOUR FEARS

So you’re there, in the pit of it. You are in this group of people, you’re listening to side conversations about their new jobs…moving house…that new Korean spot down the street. YOU ARE THERE TOO. You are a part of it! Join in. Even if you feel like you have absolutely no relation or common interests. As a huge introvert who gets easily overwhelmed, it’s a strange but recurring feeling to feel invisible, not present, or almost existential in large social settings. You have to hold on to that string that’s keeping you from floating up into your thoughts, and tug it back down into reality. You are a part of the conversation, you are a part of the setting. Include as much of yourself and personality as you can… and eventually you will face your fears.


I hope you enjoyed my quick tips on how to deal with feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and stressed in seemingly large social settings. This is something I struggle with working on and truly envy those who are social butterflies. All you butterflies out there…

As always, thanks for stopping by.

Rachaelle

CREATE WITH PASSION

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Day 7 into 2018 and it has already been an incredible start. I left off 2017 with great friends, both old and new, as well as better work habits that I accumulated throughout the end of the year. I hardly follow any clear cut resolutions but instead set out small, attainable goals. One of the goals is to create with passion, rather than generate frequent posts with less effort. Quality over quantity.


HOW I PLAN TO ACCOMPLISH THIS GOAL

is to focus on my interests and what inspires me. It’s easy to throw out content just to provide you with something to read, but this can become a horrible habit! Hopefully I’ll be able to create content that is interesting and helpful for times in need of fashion and wellness advice!

FINDING A NICHE

has been one of my biggest struggles with blogging, as I have many interests and feel limited if I structure everything into a single category. I am getting to know myself further every day and discovering what I love to share with you or what I don’t quite like. For now, my posts will be related to fashion, photography, wellness, and weekly favorites.

QUALITY OVER QUANTITY

or QUANTITY WITH QUALITY will be my goal for these upcoming months. Granted, I’m sure there will be days where I go MIA, but I am definitely going to try my best to push out more content that I genuinely love and am proud of.


Thank you for sticking with me through another year. Hope you all had an amazing start to 2018. Here’s to growing together!

As always, thanks for stopping by.

Rachaelle

Are you there, God?

We look up to higher beings when we feel like we have lost control or when we can no longer see the future ahead of us. We feel powerless. Admittedly, I have wavering faith in the power that HE has. His love is powerful. We ask for guidance only in desperate times, but fail to appreciate everything he has already shown and provides for us daily. The humor in this is when I prayed and wished for a sign or direction in life today, he literally led me to a sign. Plenty of signs.

There is no sign. Only trust.


As always, thanks for stopping by.

– Rachaelle

WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN 5-10 YEARS?

Here is a smidge of work I did this week on the wellness dimensions most important in my life currently, and the role of psychosocial health in relationships.


Most of us are generally in the same stage in life, if not the same age, we all struggle with transitioning and adapting to new changes. Through these daily changes, it is essential to apply all dimensions of health and wellness in order to thoroughly take care of your mind and body. Currently, the occupational and emotional dimensions are the most important in my life. As a transfer student, I am struggling to adapt to new systems and teachings, while working and earning money to pay for school. It’s a tough balance, but the occupational dimension is a huge factor in my life that ensures I push myself at work in order to have savings to pursue an education. In addition, I try to ensure that my time at school does not go to waste. This goes hand in hand with the emotional dimension, because it is often tough to keep a positive and steady outlook on situations that seem unbearable or even impossible.

Hopefully, in 5 to 10 years I will not be as narrow minded as I am now, and try to find my balance in all the wellness dimensions. Finding this steady balance and prioritizing all of the dimensions is what produces a healthy mind and body. In relation, psychosocial health is a key factor when achieving a healthy mind and body. Having friends and family to share your thoughts with allows you to fully express your emotions. As a result, these relationships are bonded further when connecting emotionally.


As always, thanks for stopping by.

Rachaelle

IT’S A WRAP! SUMMER 2017

Well, not just yet. Just a few more weeks until the beloved Summer 2017 comes to a closing. Here are my tips to soak up the sun.



Go out and do something you've always wanted to do!

As always, thanks for stopping by.
– Rachaelle

*Sushi pictured is from Osawa Shabu Shabu & Sushi! Located in Pasadena, CA. Definitely drop by if you're in the area.

FOR A DAY LIKE THIS ONE

Dear Father in heaven, we praise and exalt you. We thank you for everything for being faithful on your promises. Forgive us in all the moments we questioned our faith, in times that our faith bends and in times our faith crumbles. Father, we do not understand your majestic plans for us, but we entrust our lives in to your hands. Give us strength to overcome all our adversaries and keep hold on to our faith. Lastly Father, guide us, keep us in the right path and lead us to your kingdom in heaven. We ask this through Christ our savior, Amen. 

But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” – James 1:6

ARE YOU HIDING SOMETHING? 

Keeping it short and sweet today. 

Today’s day and age of feeling recognition has become a situation of expressing subliminal messages through social media posts rather than straight up verbal honesty and communication. Be truthful to the people who you care most about. 

That is all.

As always, thanks for stopping by. 

– Rachaelle

QUITTING UNIVERSITY AFTER 2 QUARTERS: AM I A FAILURE? 

Well, to some it’s called quitting. Bottom line is, university is not for me. But let’s rewind a bit…

As a lost high school senior, amongst a crowd of other naive teenagers, I was to decide my entire future within a matter of months. Major? Career choice? College? In state or out? Off campus living or dorming? Do you want to make loads of money, or actually be content with what your profession is every day?

I primarily chose to attend a University of California just because “it sounded better” than going to a CSU or vocational college. Even at a school that lacked the major I truly wanted, it was fine because it was a university, therefore success was inevitable. Sounds stupid, but I let my pride and selfishness get to me and chose to attend this school, just because it was a university. I know that I am not the only one when I admit that.

The notion was that SUCCESS = UNIVERSITY, and nothing else.

With solely myself in mind, I did not thoroughly consider the financial part of everything, and assumed I would be able to ride out the waves with financial aid covering a majority of my tuition and fees. After grants and loans had reduced my payment, there was still a substantial amount leftover to pay each quarter. Reality hit me when I was notified that I had 3 days to pay around $3,000. To some, this might have been possible. In my situation, this payment was literally impossible. The tears of a sad broke college student went everywhere as I waited on hold with advisors for over 40 minutes.Did I really want to continue my education at a university, for a major I’m not even interested in?

“Rachaelle, just get a real job and stop blogging and fucking around…Just change your major…”

Even if I had a part time job it would not be nearly enough to cover everything, and with the amount of stress (and debt) I put my family through, I would rather pay back my parents than continue attending a university I felt no connection to.

I have decided to withdraw from university, not because I’m giving up, not because I’m a failure or I’m lazy. Rather, I have realized what I actually want to pursue and how to get there in more reasonable means. In a way that makes more sense regarding my family and personal financial status. This has been one of the most challenging decisions to make, but along with education and success, you have to consider your physical and mental well being as well. Simply, I was just not happy in this city or school. Everyone will make mistakes in life, big or small. I am just glad I caught this mistake before a whirlwind of dissatisfaction and emptiness had hit me 4 years later, with a useless degree and a bland job I hated. Everyone makes mistakes, and this was just one of thousands I had made this past year.

I have decided to leave university not because I am a failure, but because there are several different roads to SUCCESS and infinite ways to define truly being successful and happy.

As always, thanks for stopping by.

– Rachaelle

4 DEFINITE WAYS TO ACHIEVE YOUR GOALS 

Self explanatory? Yes. But we all need this reminder every now and then. Go out there, take action, and actually accomplish your goals! 

1. ELIMINATE DISTRACTIONS 

Yes, I love to browse Instagram and online shop too. But if you are set on accomplishing something, you have to set things aside for a bit! If this is a goal that is truly important and beneficial to you, putting aside all distractions will help you get there faster. Work hard, and remember what you are working for. 

2. TAKE STEADY, SMALL STEPS 

The most of us are impatient and want to quickly finish tasks in order to move on to the next. Unfortunately, this is not the way to go! By taking small steps, bit by bit you will find that you are closer to your goal. Take it easy, yet work hard. 

3. REMIND YOURSELF WHY YOU ARE DOING IT 

Why are you even doing this in the first place? If you have a goal, stick to it. The road to accomplishing it will be tough, and it is most likely that you will make mistakes here and there. It’s up to you to push yourself to keep going. 

4. REWARD YOURSELF 

Small steps deserve rewards too. Work hard, but don’t overwork yourself. It takes time to succeed, but it is essential to take care of your mind and body first in order for you to be successful. Take breaks and pig out sometimes! You deserve it. 

Good luck my friends, let’s get shit done! 

As always, thanks for stopping by.

– Rachaelle